Yard sales and life

For those of you that know me, you know that I am NOT a morning person. That may be the understatement of this century. Not that I am grumpy or anything when I get up. I like a beautiful sunrise as well as the next person. I would just prefer to see it from a cruise ship balcony or while on vacation. I can focus, I can go to work, it's just that I don't feel 100% until around 9 or 10. Add to the fact I am not a coffee drinker and there you go!

However, I was up and out the door at 7:00 this morning to go to some yard sales I saw advertised. True, I struck out, only picked up one book that I plan to try reselling on eBay for a substantial profit, but I did profit in another way.

I was on my third yard sale and found a table with a couple of vintage household items. There was a Pillsbury Doughboy doll, an old can of Pick-Up Sticks circa 1960, and some classic signs, like Coca-Cola from the 60's as well. It made me think of my childhood, yet another reminder if you saw yesterday's post. Over the years Mom and I have made a practice of going to yard sales, it gets us out of the house for a while, we usually stop at Wawa for coffee (for Mom!) and for creamed chipped beef on biscuits for breakfast. It has become a tradition of us. And it's a nice mother/son thing to do.

I usually look for books and DVD's. Mom looks for figurines, like her Precious Moments and Hummels, and then we look for things we can use around the house. It's amazing what other people find that you never saw in stores, we have done very well in the past year. We found a great little tv tray with collapsible legs last year, it's great for when we eat dinner and watch Jeopardy together every night (yet another tradition!). And occasionally I'll spot something totally bizarre, like the electronic Grim Reaper I found last year for my desk at work on Halloween. Just fun things, really.

Anyway, that vintage table this morning made me reflect on yard sales a little. We tend to buy things and hold onto them for years, then something happens that makes us have to get rid of them. Like my sister, she's moving to New York and had to clean out her storage area since she's moving into a townhouse. She had her sale today, made around $150, and had to spend the last few weeks going through not only her things but her late husband's stuff. She dealt with a lot of memories, some good, some bad. Now my mom is coming back and preparing for her yard sale, she just wants to clean out the basement. I expect she will be struggling with some memories also.

That's what they're really about for me, memories. There's a saying, "One man's trash is another man's treasure." I think that's how it goes. We go to yard sales because we're looking for bargains, things they no longer sell in stores, etc. But I also think we're looking for lost memories, things from another time that will make us remember those days, maybe they're things we regret getting rid of or lost along the way and want to try to recapture. I find old books that I remember reading as a child. Sometimes I buy them to keep, sometimes to sell, but mostly because I remember my childhood as a happy time that I don't want to forget. So for a quarter I can recapture a little bit of that happiness, I think that's a bargain!

Walk down Memory Lane

I was thrilled today to get a message from an old friend (not agewise, we're still young!) that I am ashamed to say I didn't remember until today. It's funny, isn't it, how we don't remember things until a word or scent triggers something in our minds then it comes back to us in a rush? In this case it was a friend from my childhood in Connecticut.

Several months ago, back when I first signed up for Facebook, I did the usual search for friends in a race to build up my Friends list (so it looked like I had some!) and decided to go back to the happiest time of my life, back when I lived in Hamden, CT. I found Mary, a girl that lived down the street, and her friends' page led me to several others. It was like going home again! I actually have been back there, had a very pleasant visit with my friend Mark's parents, and looked up their daughter Susan who I used to walk to school with. I even have some pictures from back then that I may get up the nerve to put on here (I looked like a dweeb back then!).

Now my friend Anne was talking to Mary who was nice enough to mention me, and she remembered me from back then! She told me she remembered playing with me, I think we also played with Mimi too! Thinking about those days makes me remember playing kickball in the street, going to the park near the school, and getting ice cream from the people that had an ice cream truck at the house next to the alley leading to the park.

It's amazing how it all comes back to you! Especially with my memory! Those were wonderful days, it was a small neighborhood filled with the nicest people, I wish I could go back and find the same people still living there. Unfortunately, we have grown up, and gone our separate ways. But at least the people haven't changed, the fact they are keeping in touch shows that they value friendship, as I do.

"You can't go home again." Thomas Wolfe said that, I believe, and he was right. But there is always the chance to see people again, like high school or family reunions, and maybe I will get that chance to see some of the people again that were the best friends I ever had!

Thank God It's Friday!

Friday is nearly upon us,it's time for the weekend! Get ready to count the hours and minutes of the last workday of the week (for the Monday through Friday people)and then head for the nearest bar for happy hour, or home to flop in a recliner and take the first deep breath in five days, or to get packed up for the run to the beach for the weekend.

Sadly, I'm not doing any of those things. I actually don't know what to do this weekend. I don't think there is anything on I want to watch, I can't really afford the gas to go to the beach just to sit on the sand by myself, I don't go to Happy Hour anywhere (maybe I should start!), and I don't feel like going to yard sales.

Sometimes it's not a bad idea to just stay in and think. After all, it's free, nobody is going to demand a penny for your thoughts (I wonder who came up with that anyway, my thoughts are worth more than a penny, just click on the Amazon link here and order something so I can prove that!), and you might actually come away with something more valuable than money. I think I think too much sometimes, and I come away feeling poorer.

Take last Saturday for instance. I remember thinking about getting my hair cut, maybe going for a crew cut. Fortunately, I gave it enough thought to realize my hair is too fine and wouldn't stand up properly for a crew cut fashion. So by staying in and thinking about it I saved myself all that misery.

I did go out last Saturday for a while, I was looking for a used cooler. To my surprise the vendors at the Farmer's Market all closed up early because of the heat, I don't remember them ever closing at 3:00 on a Saturday before. I guess only idiots were out running around in 100 degree weather looking for coolers. Another good reason to stay in - the heat! Why go out when you have air conditioning?

But there are advantages to going out. I understand the Cecil County Fair is going on this week in Fair Hill, Maryland. Maybe I need to get out and be around people, watch the hog races, the demolition derby, and the Masters of the Chainsaw (whatever that is!)

I guess the best thing about the weekend is the fact that you don't have to go to work (unless you work weekends), your time is your own, and you can do what you want (within reason). Maybe I'll take time to read all these books about blogging I've been getting.

Anyway, it's FRIDAY! Enjoy!

Fantasies

Bet I can read your mind right now, you saw the title and thought, "OH BOY, hubba hubba! Now it's getting good, cold shower, here I come after I read this!"

Well, sorry, apparently you don't know me as well as you thought you did. My fantasies wouldn't raise a sweat on a Pepsi can on a hot day! One or two, maybe, but rest assured I won't be putting those on here. I admit I do have one or two, I'm a guy after all, but most of mine are...humdrum, for lack of a better word.

There are all kinds of fantasies. There's Fantasy Island, with "Boz Boz da plane!" from that creepy little guy, I wouldn't have wanted to be stuck on an island with him! I did applaud Roger Moore in "The Man with the Golden Gun" when 007 trapped him in a trunk and put him in the rigging of a yacht at the end. Me, I would have just shot him and dumped him over the boat.

Then there are the diabolical little ones. Like the ones I have about my mother's boss, I have these fantasies of what to do with her and her husband, usually they involve the Chesapeake Bay, a boat with no oars, and enough salt water sprayed on them to attract every mosquito on the East Coast and no sunblock. When I have more time, I dream up exotic deaths worthy of the old "Batman" tv series. Why the Penguin or Joker never just shot them I'll never understand, they always got out of their predicament and caught them again and again. You would think the archcriminals (Hah!) would have learned.

And then there are the ones for my ex. They usually involve carjackers, knives, and sewage treatment plants. And those are the nice ones!

To be totally honest I do have fantasies about women. Like the one where I'm driving on Rt. 202 in Wilmington and Valerie Bertinelli, who's in town visiting her family, bumps into my car. I agree not to sue her if she has dinner with me, usually by candlelight. I admire her though so it ends there, not in some cheap motel. And the ones where I win the lottery and I buy a boat crewed by Scandinavian women, but only because 1. Scandinavians are GREAT sailors, and 2. Let's be honest, I'm a guy, why would I want to look at sailors named Sven all day?

And finally, there are the everyday fantasies, where I dream I'm popular, surrounded by friends, good looking (hey, I said it was a fantasy!), and I'm happy doing whatever it is I do for a living. That is the one that seems the most likely to happen, I just haven't found out what it is yet.

I like to think fantasies can come true if you work hard enough to make them happen. Someday I could be popular, and I could be happy in some form of employment. That's called being realistic, we all have a shot at those two. As far as good looking, well, mirrors don't lie. As far as the lottery, you never know. Valerie Bertinelli, really a long shot, I would have a better chance with the lottery!

So it's okay to fantasize, or dream, a little. Depending on them to just happen means you're pretty much doomed to disappointment. But we need those dreams to keep us going. Life can be too depressing sometimes.

So now you can take your cold shower, or whatever. Sorry if I disappointed you but this is MY blog!

The Game of Life

Who remembers "The Game of Life?" I do, in fact, I found a picture of it. I love games, any kind. To this day I'm undefeated at "Monopoly." I like board games, computer games, baseball games, football games, verbal games, etc.

I was thinking today that life itself is a game. On some occasions, if we make the right moves, we win a prize. Sometimes we don't know what to do so we just "roll the dice," and go from there. Other times we lose. Sometimes there's a penalty, sometimes we're playing by ourselves a game like "Yahtzee," and nobody except ourselves is going to know how we did. But we'll know. Sure, it isn't something I'm going to keep track of and announce 3 months from now something like, "Hey, 3 months ago I scored 270 on Yahtzee!" See, I played that two nights ago and remember my score. Not that it was great or anything. But I accomplished something, I got "Yahtzee" on that round. Sometimes I don't get it at all.

That's one of the points here. It may be a game of entertainment, it may be a sports event that we go to, or a game that we participate in. No matter what it is, we accomplish something. We learn from our mistakes, our defeats. Like playing chess, which is something I can do, you play against an opponent and remember strategies that he uses or that you use with success. It's an accomplishment no matter if you win or lose.

There was a movie, "War Games," with Matthew Broderick. It's about a NORAD computer that has the General Staff thinking the USA is about to be nuked. In the end Broderick has to teach the computer that sometimes if you win, you lose. Or that sometimes there is no winner. There's a General in there that says the priceless line that people remember that movie for, "Ah'd piss on a spark plug if it would do any good."

Well, sometimes so would I. I even know what a spark plug is (not bad for someone who isn't mechanically inclined.) And no, it wouldn't do any good, not in any instance I can think of.

The final point here is that we can look at life as a game. We can choose to play and try to win, we can lose the round we're playing and put it back on the shelf, and we can try another game and see how we do. If we don't look at life as a game, then we take life seriously. Nothing wrong with that but we can take it too far. And when we lose, life is over.

So I'm choosing to look at it like a game, and I try and consider my strategy before I make a move. I'm not always going to win, but I can try to do my best. That's all we can do - try our best. And sometimes there is no winner, it's a stalemate. But I'm having fun finding new games, learning the rules and finding people to play with. And the people are what makes it interesting!

Right now I have to go and send some monsters into someone's backyard. It relaxes me, just like reading. And tomorrow I have to play the game of life again. Let's hope I win a round!

Who is normal?

It seems like every day that little voice in my mind (Yes, I hear voices, doesn't everyone?) pops up and asks, "Am I normal?" And the answer is right there, "NO!" (Yes, there are two voices. I'm not surprised the second one is female!)

There used to be a television show called "Herman's Head." I doubt that many of my followers (yes, I am aware there are only two right now, thank you, but hopefully there WILL be more! {That was to the female voice}), remember that show, but it used to be quite good, except it only ran for 3 seasons. It was about a young fact-checker named Herman. Whenever Herman had a thought, various conflicting aspects of his psyche were personified and interacted in a cluttered, attic-like room. The emotions represented were anxiety, intellect, sensitivity, and lust. I could really see my mind appearing as a cluttered attic, it's getting more cluttered every day. Anyway, the 4 emotions would argue and come to a decision in the space of a second in Herman's time. Surprising, he seemed normal considering what the emotions were like.

I had an interesting day. I found out this morning that my cell phone, which I have had for some time, was a blank slate and I had to download the features I had been wanting. I thought they came with it and I just couldn't find them! Admit it, cell phones are very complex these days! Then I worked on my car a little, actually managed to make a temporary minor repair (not bad for someone who is mechanically inept!) I then went on to find another item I had been looking for and succeeded. All in all, I felt pretty good! I felt like a normal person!

Then I had my class in Real Estate Law. In case I haven't mentioned it before, I'm taking a real estate course. I always come out of that class needing Tylenol and feeling like a moron. Then I went to my favorite cousin's house (she was home) and my cousin helped me out with this blog page, which I hope you will notice the changes on! Excellent job Warren! That is Warren C., Vice-President and partner in a local web design company. I keep forgetting to ask if he would like to advertise his company on here. You could not ask for a better creative talent, and I am not saying that because he's a relative. He explained what he was doing and I came away tonight feeling like I had learned something, which I haven't felt in a while. That is also the reason why it looks like I missed Monday's post. I like to do my post at the end of the day, it gives me time for reflection on the day's events and my topic for the day. As I didn't get in until 2 a.m., I feel I can be excused, as this is really Monday's post.

Back to what I was saying though. I look at all these people who are successful in their fields. My teacher at school, who is a real estate lawyer. My cousin Debbie, who is a real estate agent. My cousin Warren, who is not only a partner and V.P. of his company but also teaches web design at a local college. My therapist Debra who is also a teacher, author and entrepreneur. I see the success they have achieved through higher education and wonder if it is too late for me to go to school and start a new career. My doctor tells me no, it is not too late, and I should go for it!

I look at all these successful people, who are my friends, and think they are normal people. I look at other people I meet, they seem normal. I look in the mirror, and realize one thing. Who am I to judge who and what is normal? People make choices in life about family and education and either benefit or suffer. I have done that just like everyone else. Everyone's life is different, therefore we are not normal, but unique.

I guess I just answered the question in the title. Who is normal?

NOBODY! (and that is to the little voices also!)

Let's go to the movies!

I decided to do something a little different tonight, I have been talking about books quite a bit but maybe it's time to talk about some of my favorite movies, as well as some that I've seen recently.

For example, tonight I was watching "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium" starring Dustin Hoffman.  You may remember him from the movie "Tootsie," and he also did "Rain Man."  The movie was about a toy store that was alive, for lack of a better description.  Mr. Magorium felt the time had come for him to move on, or die to put it bluntly, and he asked his store manager to take the store and keep it going.  Even though he had faith in her, she didn't feel she had the magic to keep it going.  I won't tell you how it ends.  Anyway, when he died, everything in the store lost its life and became dull and black.  It was like the scene in "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban."  The one where the dementors come and suck all the life and joy out of people.  Anyway, the moral of the movie was that there is magic in the world, all it takes is a spark to keep it alive.

And I saw "All About Steve," which I've already talked about in another post.  It's message was to be the person you are, there's somebody out there for you who will appreciate you the way you are.

And there are many others that have given me something to think about.  Like Patrick Swayze in "Road House," when he's giving his new staff instructions.  "Be Nice."  Even if you think someone's a jerk, "Be Nice."  If someone insults you, "Be Nice."  Until the time comes to not "Be Nice."  Nice guys finish last - I believe that, actually, I'm proof  of that.  I won't go into detail, but maybe it is time for me to expand my thinking.  I've always tried to keep things in perspective, black and white, etc.  And I've realized there is a gray area between the black and white.  Maybe it's time for me to widen the gray area.

I've learned a lot from books and a lot from movies.  Even movies that are meant just for entertainment can have a message for us.  What I've learned is to look for a message in many places, even the unexpected places we find ourselves.  It may not be recognizable as a message, and we may not even realize we've seen it until much later, but there is a great deal of meaning in life and sooner or later we will understand.

Too Hot To Think!

This will be a short post, as all I have been able to think about today is the heat wave that we've been living with.  It is surprising, usually I look forward to summer and hate winter; however, this year it seems like I'm much less tolerant of the heat than I usually am.  Maybe it's old age creeping up on me.  I look in the mirror and see so much gray hair it's discouraging.  So I'm looking forward to fall and winter now!

I have also been dealing with headaches for a few days.  Again, I blame the heat and humidity for that, although the demands of life may also have something to do with it, I have been dealing with some difficulties lately in my personal life that I won't trouble you with.

The way I have been dealing with it all is to immerse myself in several things to keep my mind off the way things are.  I have finished my last book, "Corsair" by Clive Cussler and have now embarked on another one of his books "Dark Watch."  I am also trying several new games and enjoying some movies on tv.  I stopped and picked up some books from the library on blogging so be prepared for some changes on here.

I think I am going to take advantage of one more way to fight this heat wave - ice cream!  Feel free to join me, sundaes are an awesome weapon!

God Bless America (hope he does anyway, it needs it)

This is a sad post today.  It's about America.  I grew up here, was always taught to be proud of this country, was told we have the best freedoms in the world, and so on.  Like Lee Greenwood's song "God Bless the USA", I always felt it an honor to live here.  Well, I don't really want to anymore.  We have descended too far, and I feel sorry for all of our veterans that have fought for this country.  Even they are not treated as they should be by our government and healthcare system after the sacrifices they have made.

The reason for this post is an article I saw today.  Here is a partial copy of it.

BELL, Calif. – Three administrators whose huge salaries sparked outrage in this small blue-collar suburb of Los Angeles have agreed to resign, the City Council said Friday.


Council members emerged from an hours-long closed session at midnight Friday and announced that they'd accepted the resignations of Chief Administrative Officer Robert Rizzo, Assistant City Manager Angela Spaccia and Police Chief Randy Adams.

Rizzo was the highest paid at $787,637 a year — nearly twice the pay of President Barack Obama — for overseeing one of the poorest towns in Los Angeles County.

Spaccia makes $376,288 a year and Adams earns $457,000, 50 percent more than Los Angeles Police Chief Charlie Beck.

The three will not receive severance packages, the Los Angeles Times reported Friday. Rizzo will step down at the end of August and Spaccia will leave at the end of September. Adams will also leave at the end of August, after completing an evaluation of the police department, the Times said.

"I'm happy that they resigned but I'm disappointed at the pension that they're going to receive," said Ali Saleh, a member of the Bell Association to Stop the Abuse or BASTA.

Rizzo would be entitled to a state pension of more than $650,000 a year for life, according to calculations made by the Times. That would make Rizzo, 56, the highest-paid retiree in the state pension system.

Adams could get more than $411,000 a year.

Revelations about the pay in Bell has sparked anger in the city of fewer than 40,000 residents. Census figures from 2008 show 17 percent of the population lives in poverty.


This is just so wrong, everyone I know is barely able to get by, yet our politicians, professional athletes, and others I am not able to think of right now are getting exorbitant salaries that they just don't need!  Especially in the above instance where so many people are living in poverty.

What is wrong with America?  Why do we allow this?  Why have we put people in office that allow this?  WHY?  WHY?  WHY?  Can't anybody see this for the problem it is?  Can't anybody do anything about this? 

The answer is no.  That's the sad part.  That is why I am ashamed to be an American.  Maybe our enemies are right to hate us, are we really giving them any reason to like us when we treat our own citizens like the people in Bell, California?

Think about it.

P.S.  Just saw where Hillary Clinton is getting involved with China and their outlying island dispute.  I think I'm just going to sit here and watch our country decay even further.  Next she'll be offering them financial aid.  Why not, we don't have any Americans that need money or help, right?

Schedules and Spontaneity

It occurred to me, with a little help from a friend, that sometimes we need to take a break from our daily schedule and find time for personal enjoyment.  I know that I tend to fall into that Monday through Friday, 9-5 routine.  I would go to work at 8:30, take my lunch from 1-2, at 4:30 do the mail, and at 5:00 leave for the day.  Then after arriving at home, I would plan to watch Jeapordy from 7 - 7:30 with Mom, and then the rest of the night would be unplanned.  On Saturday and Sunday I would play it by ear, see what happens, then get ready for Monday through Friday again.

Don't get me wrong, I recognize the need for a work schedule, and I enjoy spending time with Mom.  I strive for punctuality, I feel it's rude to be late for things and keep other people waiting.  But I also feel the need to just be spontaneous, it relaxes me and leaves me open for possibilities.  Living our life according to a schedule can be stressful.  Every detail of life can't be planned, you would miss out on so much.

For some it's easier than others, there are family obligations, bills, school events, etc.  For a single person it's easier to be spontaneous than a married person.  But there is so much stress in the world today, sometimes it's worth it to take a break from routine, even if it's just deciding to stop on the spur of the moment for a water ice, or to take a short walk in a park. 

So all my friends, please take a moment to stop and think about this, and take a break from routine once in a while and relax and have fun.  Stress can affect your health and I want all my friends to live long and healthy lives, otherwise who will read all these posts?

Simplicity!

Tonight's post is going to be easy to remember - it's simple, just think of me!

I was reminded today of how complicated things have become in this country.  Look at Shirley Sherrod, she was asked to resign over something that happened over 20 years ago.  Nobody wanted to listen to her side of things, yet once they looked deeper the White House begged her forgiveness.  Just like court cases, how many people have been found guilty of crimes they didn't commit just because nobody bothered to properly investigate?

When you consider less than 200 years ago in the Old West property could change hands with a handshake, 50 gold coins, and a note that said something like, "I Joe Smith sell my ranch to Tom Jones for 20 gp."  That was it.  A man's horse was his livelihood, if someone stole his horse and was caught they hung the thief, no long drawn out appeal process.  If somebody stole something smaller they would either jail him or cut off his hand.  A man could be arrested on Monday, have a chance to talk to his lawyer on Tuesday, have the trial Wednesday, and either be freed or hung on Thursday.  They didn't have overcrowded prisons in the Old West.

Look at taxes, it was simple enough to either pay them back in Colonial days or dump tea in Boston Harbor.  The tax code wasn't that complicated, it probably fit on one scroll.  Now we have entire law firms and the IRS and they can't figure it all out.

I like things simple, do you have any idea how many PIN's I have to remember, along with passwords, etc.  Look at my cell phone, I will probably have it for 5 years and only understand how to use 5% of it's functions.

What happened, why did the world get so complex and confusing?  Give me my cabin on a mountain with a fence and a shotgun and a room full of books and I'll be happy.  Anybody want to join me?  Ask for an invitation, since I'll shoot anybody that trespasses past the fence!

My favorite topic!

Forgive the lateness in posting for Tuesday's blog, but it is tied in with the topic.  The reason is that I was finishing a book so I would have the opportunity to write about it on here.

The book was Clive Cussler's Flood Tide.  For those of you who aren't familiar with the name, Clive Cussler has been an author for quite some time.  He is credited with over 40 books, among them Raise the Titanic, Night Probe, and several non-fiction books which describe his real-life adventures searching for lost ships of historical significance.

I first started reading Cussler's books back in the 80's.  The hero of one of his series, a marine engineer named Dirk Pitt, I found particularly compelling.  Unlike many of the heroes in today's fiction, Pitt has been injured many times through the course of his adventures, yet manages to survive and bring the story to an exciting conclusion.  Cussler has also created other series, such as The Oregon Files, The Fargo Adventures, The Isaac Bell novels, The Kirk Austin Adventures, and as I previously stated his non-fiction works, The Sea Hunters.  All of the characters are portrayed as human beings, prone to injury, pain and suffering, and emotional and physical loss.

While a fan of the James Bond movies, one of my problems with them was the fact that Bond never appeared to be injured.  I like realism in movies and books, not that I enjoy seeing people hurt but I do believe that when someone is hit in the face they are likely to bleed or get bruised.

I think we all get along better with people when we realize they are human beings with problems just like we have.  How often do we sit in a restaurant and enjoy a meal?  I do occasionally, probably as much as the next person, and I usually look at the people working there and imagine them doing their jobs every day.  From the cook standing over a hot stove, even on the hottest and coldest days of the year, to the waitress dealing with the kind and the difficult people afte being on her feet for hours, to the busboys (been there, done that!), cleaning up after diners day in and day out.

And what about the other people out there?  The construction workers pouring hot tar on the roads in 100 degree weather, the doctors trying to save people lives and not always succeeding.  I think of all kinds of people that work behind the scenes in our country and are never appreciated, and knowing they do it sometimes for minimum wage and no benefits.

It angers me to see these football and baseball players earning millions while the American public is charged more and more to see these games in person.  Why should a baseball player be contracted for millions when the chances are he will strike out more often than he hits the ball and scores?

The point I am making is that I enjoy books that are realistic, the author understands the human condition and has a way of identifying with you that captures your interest.  I have found a large number of those authors, the thousands of books in my basement can attest to that.  These books have been an escape for me, an inspiration at times, a source of knowledge, and I look at them as friends I can carry with me wherever I go.  And in today's world, where you can buy them for a quarter at a yard sale, that is a small price to pay for something that can give so much pleasure to so many.

So the next time there's nothing on tv, you don't want to pay $10 to see a movie you may not like as well as $3 for a small soda, or sit in the cold rain watching your team lose after you shelled out $25 for a ticket as well as paying for parking, grab a book!

Communications

Back again today, although as I said the earlier post should be credited to Sunday, as it took me a while to gather my thoughts and post them, and it really wasn't my fault it wasn't done until early Monday morning.  Circumstances just didn't permit me to do it on the calendar day.

That there is what this post is about - communication.  There are many kinds of communication out there.  Radio (yes, that's still around!), T.V. (hi-def now!), newspapers (probably not for long, they are on the Internet for viewing), letters (not so much now, leading to....), e-mail (which will soon replace the postal service), sign language, etc.  Probably many I don't know about!

No matter how we do it, communication is important.  Lack of it has led to wars, divorce, disasters, pain and suffering, death, whatever.  When two people share information, that's communication.  When one person does it, say on a blog when he's sitting all alone and trying to share his thoughts, that's communication.  When a group is at a sports event and the umpire is making bad calls and they're giving him suggestions on what he should do (even if it's anatomically impossible!), that's communication.

I try to communicate with someone every day.  I usually speak to my mother, a day doesn't go by that I don't talk to her.  It's because of love, and because I worry about her, and because she worries about me and I want to reassure her that I'm all right.  It's not too difficult to get hold of her, I know her work schedule, when she'll be home, and because I have done all I can to make sure she can hear her cell phone and access it easily when I call and she is out and about.  Then there are the other people.  My sister, who either misplaces or forgets to charge her cell phone and never answers it, then gives Mom and I grief for not answering ours when she calls (like that happens a lot!).  My two male cousins (who have no excuse at all, especially when one of them has two cell phones and STILL can't answer it, listen to his messages, or return his calls!).  And the other people who I know are extremely busy and trust they will get back to me when they can.

I hate phones, I answered one at work for 10 years and that was enough for me.  I have a cell phone, I admit it comes in handy but I am not addicted to it like other people are.  I don't spend much time talking, I use the other features of it, like the Web browser for reference, or the notepad for keeping track of things, the calendar for appointments, and the cameras for the sudden photo op.   When it rings I tend to groan first, then check to see who's calling.  I do not intend to be one of those irritating, annoying people you are in the same store with and you have to listen to every detail of their lives, like what Jane Doe is doing behind their back, how their boyfriend treats them, etc.  I try to keep my conversations private.  I would love to get all those people together in an auditorium somewhere and let them get on each others nerves.  And as far as the drivers that are all over the road because they're too busy talking on their cells to pay attention to what they're doing, well, don't get me started.

The world is getting smaller and smaller, communication devices (like cell phones) are getting more sophisticated and allowing people to talk and see each other clear around the world.  So why is it I can't understand people and they can't understand me?  It's because we're too busy talking and not communicating.  As I said in the beginning, it's the sharing of ideas.  Or is it that I'm not talking enough to let people know how I feel?

Last thought.......I care about the people in my life.  Please communicate with me and let me know how you care about me, then do it with the other people who are important in your life.  Trust me, it's necessary.

(P.S.  One day I WILL find a way to permanently fasten cell phones to certain people I know, so they will charge automatically and they will have no excuse not to answer when I call - especially the ones who claim I'm hard to reach!)

Friendship - a fresh perspective

Technically you could say that I missed a day in posting for this blog; however, I prefer to think that I took my time to gather my thoughts together during that period of time and this is merely a delay in getting them on this page so that you will all benefit from my thoughts, thus making it worth the time.

I've been seeing some interesting movies lately, the one that captured my interest the most was "All About Steve," starring Sondra Bullock.  She plays a crossword puzzle designer for a large newspaper, is loquacious (look it up!) to a fault, and is criticized so much in one day for not being normal that she accepts a blind date, who she views as her ticket to normalcy.  When he is put off by her aggressiveness, she writes a puzzle about him, is fired since nobody can solve it, and proceeds to chase him across the country.  In the process she finds people that like her for who she is, and she learns that if you have to change yourself for somebody he is probably not worth it.  That's an extremely simplified version of it, I recommend you watch the movie to learn the lesson for yourself.

It made me really think though.  I have not had anybody I can call friends since I lived in Connecticut, back when I was around 7 years old.  I had no friends in my school years, I was pretty much ostracized by the other kids.  Things didn't really change once I graduated, I had become an introvert by then.  Since then I was lucky enough to make a few friends at various jobs, but they have always been M-F, 9-5 friends.  The friendships pretty much stopped when I left work.  My marriage (which was the biggest mistake of my life) was not so much a relationship as it was a tolerance of each other; sadly it took me 10 years to realize that.

Right now I have my relatives, who are there for me, and three special women who have stood by me.  They are more than friends, supporters would be closer but not enough, all I can say is that they are extremely special to me.  I've come to realize in the past 24 hours that I sometimes ask too much of all these people.

I am alone, through no fault of my own.  I have tried to be friendly to people, and have wondered what is wrong with me when they have failed to respond.  But being alone does not mean friendless.  I cannot expect these people to be there for me when I want them to be.  I realize they have their own lives to lead, their careers, their other friends and relatives they need to be there for.  I just need to meet more people, and to be there for them when they need me to be.  Instead of focusing on a few, I need to be there for many.  Maybe that doesn't make sense to you, maybe it's just the 3 a.m. ramblings of my inner thoughts, but let me try to summarize it.

There are people that like me for who I am, not who I have been portrayed to be by others, but because they know me.  They know me, and they like me.  Why have I been asking for more than that?  The fact these people are special to me, and they like me for myself, should be enough for me.  It is enough. I respect them and trust their judgment, and they like the person I am.  If I try to change myself I will risk losing them, which would be a bigger mistake than my marriage.

So there it is.  Why change?  It's a big world out there and I have not seen nearly enough of it.  There was a line in that movie that is appropriate.  A trucker said "If you missed the bus maybe you weren't meant to be on it."  Like my special women like to say, "Everything happens for a reason."  So I missed the friendship bus, I don't like buses anyway, I would rather be driving my own car on my own road.  And just possibly, like Sondra Bullock in the movie, I will find more people along the way that will like me for who I am.

Have to go, time to hit the road!  (although I will wait until I get some sleep!)

Writer's Block!

This is frustrating, it is only the fourth day of this blog and already I am stumped for a topic!  Therefore, I will have to regale you with the events of the day.

I was up during the night enjoying Mother Nature's fireworks show.  I like to stand by a door or window and watch the lightning flashing across the sky, and with the occasional crack of thunder it is almost like a display on the 4th of July.  The rains was coming down with a vengeance, I felt sorry for the people I could see driving in it, let alone the ones that had to get out of their cars.  I went to sleep and woke up around 9 o'clock, I was entitled to sleep in as it is the weekend and the storm kept me up.

Today I watched tv and am near the end of the current Clive Cussler Oregon Files book I'm reading, titled "Skeleton Coast."  At the left side of this post you will see the first book in that series, titled "Golden Buddha."  For those who like to read adventure books I can recommend this series highly.  It's about a group of mercenaries that operate out of a battered freighter, mostly ex-CIA, military, and several civilians with specialized talents.  Money is not always the issue with them, they will do what they feel is right regardless of the cost.  The high tech nature of the ship and their equipment, plus the frequent humorous parts, allows for complex plots and keeps your interest.

I did go out to get something to eat, life can not always be microwave meals, tacos, and pizza (even though they are my favorite food groups!), and then came back to catch the end of the movie "17 Again."  This looked like a good movie, hopefully it will be on again so I can see the whole thing.

I will be doing a few more things on this blog, hopefully tonight, so please check in for further updates.  I do welcome all comments, don't hesitate to be honest!

Today's topic is pets!

As you will notice, today I put pictures of two of the most terrifying animals in Delaware on this page - I speak of my two dogs, Pebbles and Bam-Bam, although they are backwards in the picture (Bam-Bam is on the left).  It just sounds better to say Pebbles and Bam-Bam rather than the other way around.  One of these days maybe I'll do a post on why some words sound better a certain way...hmm.

Anyway, the reason they are the terror of Delaware is because a few months ago the UPS driver refused to get out of his truck while they were outside on the lawn, uh, taking care of their business.  Keep in mind they weigh about 15 lbs. and are only about 18" high.  Their legs are about 6 inches long so they can't really run that fast.  However, the driver was scared. 

This was laughable because Pebbles is extremely timid and Bam-Bam freezes in place and kind of cowers when he is confronted.  I expect that is my fault as I have kept them isolated from other dogs and people, but only because I really care about them.  It is the first time I have had two Poms at once, but they are good company for each other and I wouldn't trade them for the world.

However, some people do not deserve to have pets.  Below is a clipping from the news about a house that was raided, the woman was a hoarder, and also had the following.

The place was full of feces, urine, parasites, and a whole lot of animals, dead and alive, according to authorities. As Licenses and Inspections condemned the Olney home as unfit for human habitation the Pennsylvania SPCA spent over six hours removing animals. This is one of the worst houses I've been in when you take into account the dead cats. It's ridiculous," said George Bengal of the PSPCA. Fifty dead animals, investigators say including cats, dogs, a pelican and even a fox retrieved from the basement freezer. As for live animals authorities carted out approximately 56 cats, 20 chinchillas, seven dogs, and 18 pigeons inside and around the backyard.  The woman, get this, was upset claiming her rights were violated and she cared for all the animals.

How can you call that caring when the place is unfit for habitation and is infested with germs?  And today, in South Philadelphia, 100 Chihuahuas were removed from another house, a 3-story rowhome.  These dogs appeared healthy but there was an overwhelming amount of feces which made it unfit for a human to live in, let alone animals.

I'm sorry, but I take care of two dogs and they are a handful sometimes.  I give them the love they deserve and feel that they appreciate it.  But would I be able to love 100 animals?  No, I would feel I was neglecting them all because I would be unable to give each one the attention and affection they deserve.

Last week I went by a Wawa in Bel Air, MD.   I filled up my car, which took about 5 minutes, and the entire time there was a dog barking nearby.  I followed the sound to a pickup truck which was parked in the sun, with the windows rolled up 90% of the way, with the dog inside.  The humidity level was high and the temperature that day was around 92 degrees.  Inside the truck it had to be over 100 degrees.  I promptly called the SPCA, as the Bel Air Police Dept. and the Harford County Sheriff's Department are inept, and asked them to please do something.  I furnished a vehicle description and license plate number.  The entire time I was there nobody approached the truck and that poor dog never stopped barking.  Hopefully somebody arrived in time.

What is wrong with people?  Having a pet is a responsibility and a privilege.  If you want to have one, fine, take care of it.  If you want to have more than one, be responsible and make sure you can give them the attention they deserve.  But don't let it get out of hand.  Report those people you feel are unfit pet owners, the animals will be better off, and that is worth more than having the abuser mad at you.

Remember the old saying about dogs, they're man's best friend.  We need to remedy that, make it apply to all animals and not be so male oriented.  A friend of mine loves cats and cares for hers as well as the ones she finds homes for.  Both men and women love pets, the animals love their owners and trust them to take care of them, and everyone benefits from the association.  It all comes down to love.

Day 2

This is the second day in Walt's Book of Life, if you read the Welcome! page and decided to continue on, I thank you or pity you.  Either you found my outlook on things interesting or you have nothing better to do than to keep reading.  Hopefully it was the former.

I had one of my good days/bad days (multiple) yesterday.  Some people have one good event, one bad event in a given day.  I had several of each, but that is normal for me.  As I said before, my days will make you realize that your life isn't that bad after all.

To start with, I put the final pieces of my old life behind me.  That was a good part, it means I can make a new start, open a new chapter, so to speak.  Then the bad part - I committed virtual suicide.  My former self exists no more, it was necessary to say goodbye to someone I care very deeply about.  My continued presence in her life could only cause her pain and difficulty.  We've seen it in movies, such as Mel Gibson's "Conspiracy Theory", where he has to die so the girl he was protecting could get on with her life.  We just don't realize until we have to say farewell how much it hurts, and how much we love that person.

The good part is now I can look forward, it can be frightening not knowing what the future holds but we hopefully can learn from our past mistakes and be more careful.  The bad part is that there are still shadows that will remain from the past that unfortunately we cannot get away from.  If you look behind you your shadow will always be there, the trick is to remember to look ahead and keep the sunlight in front of you.  I prefer sunshine to rain any day. 

Another good part was that I was able to visit with my aunt and uncle, who are definitely world travellers.  I wonder if they can remember all the countries they have visited in their lifetime.  They are wonderful people, I always enjoy talking to them and hearing about their recent journeys, this last one over the past few weeks was to Scotland, a place I have always wanted to go.  The bad part was I didn't have much time to visit, as I had been to my real estate class and been drowned in real estate law.  My head is still spinning from the knowledge I am going to have to retain for the real estate exam.

I will go over Law in another post, I have some very defined ideas about the legal and justice system in our country today.  But that is another day.  Right now I have to prepare to leave for my next class.  I just finished a book I was reading, tomorrow I will begin my book review area on here, I can promise that there will be a constant series of updates on that.

I hope you will continue to check in and follow my thoughts, I would like to think I contribute something that others will find worthy of thought.

Until the next time!

Welcome

If you're reading this, then let me inform you right now that you are a very lucky person. You may be skeptical of that now, but as you read on you will discover that you are reading the chronicles of a person whose mother's path on the way to the delivery room included passing under a ladder, having a black cat cross her path, and was probably assigned to Delivery Room #13. I am the most unlucky person you will ever want to meet; therefore, you should be feeling better about yourself now and as you read my future postings.

I'm not even really sure why I started this blog, probably because my psychiatrist recommended I do it, and even then I'm not sure why she recommended it. Probably in the hope I would learn more about myself (like I want to know more!) and she may want her other patients and students to feel better about themselves (that's the reason I'm leaning toward!). Anyway, if for no other reason, read it because she is a very intelligent woman and I have learned a lot from her so I'm sure you can too!

You will find daily (if I get to it) diatribes from me, book reviews of books I have read (usually 2-3 a week), movie reviews (if I ever get out to a movie!) and other sites that I find interesting and think others would like.

So check back from time to time, I will try to entertain you (everyone laughed when one of the Three Stooges was smacked in the head or suffered some misfortune so I'm sure my life will amuse you!) or I will post some cartoons on here for your enjoyment.

I'll talk to you later!